If you give a Pig a Helmet

This morning, as I walked back and forth from breakfast, I considered how much time I put in walking from place to place.

The PX  and phone center is a long walk from my office–even longer in a sand storm. The DFAC is a similar walk.  My CHU maybe–especially at 3 A.M.

I walk a lot.

But what is the alternative?

I could get my assistant to drive.  But, then we’d have to wear helmets…and if I had to wear a helmet, those helmets would get left in the Hum-Vee. 

If we left the helmets in the Hum-Vee, those helmets might get stolen. 

If those helmets got stolen, we couldn’t drive back. 

And if we couldn’t drive back, it might be dark. 

And if it were dark, we’d have to put on our reflective belts. 

And if we put on our reflective belts, then the whole post would know that we were walking and not driving. 

And if the whole post knew that we were walking and not driving, they would know that our helmets got stolen.

And if they knew that our helmets got stolen, then we would have to do push-ups.

And if we had to do push-ups, we would remember that we just had dinner.

And if we were remembered that we just had dinner…well, you know…it is just not worth it.